Carol Service Address 2013

This Christmas I’d like to ask you to spare a thought for the poor clergyperson.

Yes, I know, I have such a terribly hard life and your heart bleeds for me, I’m sure.

It’s not my meagre stipend I want to complain about today.

Nor is it the fact that for 11 months of the year I have to put up with so-called jokes about my only working one day a week.

You know the old line about the Vicar?

Invisible 6 days a week, and incomprehensible the 7^th.

Then for about a month now people have been saying “Your busy time coming up, Vicar!”

In fact, I’m told that my Christmas is illegal.

Under the European Working Time Directive I’m required to have at least 11 hours off after the Midnight Communion, so I’m afraid Christmas Day is cancelled.

But I do want to share with you something of the challenge of Christmas preaching.

Every year, I need at least 4 new Christmas sermons – some of them with gimmicks for the kids - and yet the message of Christmas hasn’t changed much.

You might say it’s old news.

Some Vicars get around this problem by changing jobs every 5 years, of course.

If the Vicar works really hard for the first 5 years, he’s got all his sermons prepared and he can keep moving every 5 years, and go half time for the next 25 years.

The static Vicar, however, will need about 120 different Christmas sermons throughout his career.

Because, of course, you can all remember exactly what I’ve said for the last couple of years, so there’s no chance of re-using any of the 2011 stuff.

So what is the Vicar to say about Christmas year in year out?

What is the unchanging but never out of date message of Christmas?

What can we say that is as fresh and engaging today as it was that first Christmas night in Bethlehem 2 Millennia ago?

Let me give you 3 headings:

(1)   Though the Christmas story is relatively simple, familiar and well-known, it’s got its surprises

It’s the story of a boy, a girl and a baby.

In some ways it’s a typical story.

But it’s an extraordinary one.

Of course there’re the angels and the miraculous birth.

But there are also some surprises that we sometimes overlook, aspects of the story that the Nativity play and the Christmas cards might not capture.

There’s the scandal of an unmarried pregnant teenager in a deeply conservative culture – the names they called Mary and Joseph.

There’s the difficulty of the journey from Nazareth to Bethlehem for the poor couple with the contractions about to kick in.

The mounting panic as Mary and Joseph are turned away from the Premier Inn.

The reality of the filthy stable that wouldn’t make a very nice scratch and sniff Christmas card.

The bewilderment as the agricultural poor and exotic astrologers show-up uninvited.

There’s the murderous tyrant, Herod, with his mini-genocide, and Jesus’ refugee status.

Yes, this is an amazing story, but it’s a real true story too, a gritty down to earth one.

This story is one for newspapers and history books, not for fairy-land and make-believe.

At the same time as this Eastenders realism, there’s more than the magic of Disney here too:

(2)   The Christmas story is a wonderful, inexhaustible, inexpressible mystery

The Christmas story is the story of the love of Almighty God for a sinful world.

It shows us the lengths to which God will go for you and me – that God will go the distance from heaven to earth, from a throne in glory to a stable in Bethlehem.

It’s the story of God come to earth in person: the down to earth God.

God on a rescue mission.

God come in the flesh.

The incarnation.

God our king become God our brother.

The maker in the manger.

The creator in the cradle.

Many of our carols put it well:

Lo, within a manger lies / he who made the starry skies!

Veiled in flesh the Godhead see / Hail the incarnate deity!

And a special prize for anyone who can recognise:

God contracted to a span, incomprehensibly made man.

(Charles Wesley, Let Heaven and Earth Combine)

Thirdly and finally,

(3) The Christmas story is the best news in the world ever

People sometimes think that Christianity is boring, untrue and irrelevant.

But there could be nothing more interesting, exciting, true, relevant and life-changing than the brilliant good news of Christmas.

If we don’t see that, may I respectfully suggest that we’ve missed the whole point of the story.

This is the story of all stories, and this story can touch your story.

It can make sense of it.

It allows us to hope that through all the blood and pain, and amidst the tears, happy endings are not just for Fairy Tales.

It can make all the difference to you and your family this Christmas and for ever.

Christmas means that God is real and he wants to be our friend.

Jesus’ coming into the world would take him to the cross.

This is God dying to meet us.

This true story means that God is on our side and for us, whoever we are and whatever we’ve done.

Whatever we go through in life, he is God with us: Emmanuel.

God knows from the inside what it’s like to suffer cold, poverty, rejection, loneliness, fear, and all that this world sometimes throws at us.

This story means that God doesn’t intend to stand aloof from our world, he means to come and sort it out and put it right.

At Christmas God gets human hands and he shows us that he’s willing to get them dirty:

More than that, he’s willing to have them nailed to a cross.

If there’s any chance that this is story is true then there’s nothing more important and urgent.

This story is at least worth investigating.

Like the Shepherds and the Wise Men, I want to ask you to see for yourself whether or not this might be true.

Christianity Explained course.

So, I’m glad to be able to say something to you about the Christmas story again this year.

Thank you for listening.

And God-willing, I hope to preach another 119 similar but different sermons to you over the 30 years to come.

With such a great true story, I don’t think there’s any danger of ever running out of material.

A very merry Christmas to you all.

Amen.

Jottings for a sermon on The Virgin Birth

4^th Sunday of Advent 2013

Isaiah 7:10-16 (p692)

Matthew 1:18-end (p965)

The lectionary sometimes provides puzzles for the clergy.

What on earth links these passages?

But today it’s obvious that one thing the lectionary-ographers might want us to consider is the Virgin birth of Our Lord.

I want to say about 15 things about it, some of which might be somewhat overlapping

Christians have sometimes been embarrassed about it

To do with sex!

Or rather it isn’t!

Sex good!

What need a virgin birth?

A miracle

Some Christian embarrassed by miracles

Famously denied by David Jenkins the former Bishop of Durham

An amazing miracle but no more miraculous than creation or resurrection

Christianity is irreducibly supernatural and miraculous

Not just a magic trick

Not “an unnecessary doctrine” (Blueprint) – a sign - full of significance

Not to be confused with:

(i)                 The perpetual virginity of the Blessed Virgin Mary

Protestants generally do not hold to the perpetual virginity of Mary

Jesus had at least 6 siblings

Brothers & sisters – cousins? – from a previous marriage of Joseph’s, half-brothers

Mt 1:25 – Mary and Joseph had normal marital relations

A comma in the creed!

A virgin whose name was Mary – not that she was always a virgin

(ii)               The immaculate conception (of the Blessed Virgin Mary)

Collect: “pure” virgin

Nothing especially / necessarily pure about virginity!

Marriage can be perfectly pure with lots going on in the bedroom

“Marriage is an honourable estate”

Mary was not completely pure

She greeted Jesus as her Saviour because she knew she needed saving from her sins

The Immaculate Conception, not the same thing as the virgin birth or the miraculous conception of Jesus

Roman Catholics believe that Mary was miraculously conceived in the womb of her mother so that she was preserved from the stain of original sin

 Infinite regress or not needed at all?

Perhaps we need another sermon on Mary sometime

Wonderful, uniquely blessed woman

Give thanks for her

Follow her example

but one point worth making is that Jesus is always the point

The focus should be on him rather than on Mary

That’s the way Mary would want it!

e.g. “Mother of God” – a statement primarily about Jesus rather than Mary

So with the Virgin Birth

More about Jesus than it is about Mary

Not the gods having sexual relations with women

I’m not very up on my classical mythology, but one Christian writer says about the Virgin Birth:

“This is not the pagan model of divine parenting, with Zeus turning into a swan to have his way with Leda and so give birth to the beautiful Helen of Troy”

(Michael Jensen)

Fulfilment of prophecy

A great feature of the Christmas story

Now at last the long expected Jesus has come!

Jesus is the One!

Christ, Messiah, Saviour, LORD!

(Evidence that Jesus is who he said he would be:

e.g. of the line of David, born of a virgin, in Bethlehem, but called the Nazarene, his birth unusually associated with weeping for the loss of children, would be called out of Egypt.

 3 geographical criteria for God to take care of

Associates Jesus with other miraculous births in the Bible

Mary is the last of the barren women whose miracle sons save Israel.

Mary is another Rebekah and Rachel and Hannah, all of them figures of “barren Israel” waiting for the Lord’s rescue.

 (Leithart)

Yet Unique

The only virgin birth in the Bible

Miracle

A divine intrusion

Not a step on a journey

Not an evolution

Not culmination of humanity’s religious quest

Jesus far more than a supremely spiritual man

Jesus different from Buddha in that respect

Different even from Mohamed in that Jesus is God

(blasphemous nonsense to Muslims)

No successors (in a sense)

Jesus the Supreme, Final, Greatest, Definitive, Once for all Word of God

Appropriate to a New Creation

Mary a New Eve

Jesus the seed of the woman who crushes the servant’s head

believers a new humanity

Fits with Jesus’ divinity and humanity

True God and True Man

Divine nature – 2^nd Person of Trinity takes a human nature to himself

Doesn’t change into a man

Not a 3^rd kind of being

Not a mixture

Union without confusion, distinction without separation

Perhaps it doesn’t prove Jesus is God

Muslims for example believe in the Virgin Birth of Jesus without believing in his divinity

But it’s certainly appropriate

I don’t want to be too graphic about this

Humanity has no part in saving itself

Humanity is the recipient of salvation

Man cannot make a messiah

We cannot rise up and save ourselves

We are impotent

God does the impossible

He’s always bringing life out of nothing

We cannot produce or procure or earn or repay him

We are empty but he can fill us

We need only receive him

Applications:

Believe!

Give thanks!

Quit trying to save yourself!

Receive the Saviour as Mary did (!)

Praise Jesus the God-Man

Sources included the following, I think:

The Blueprint - study guide on the UCCF doctrinal basis (St Matthias Press)

http://www.firstthings.com/onthesquare/2013/12/remembering-joseph-at-christmastime

http://sydneyanglicans.net/blogs/culture/sex-and-christmas

http://christthetruth.net/2013/12/15/luke-126-45-sermon/

http://www.canonwired.com/featured/1754/

Why can't the departed saints pray for us?

It's a good question. We ask our friends here on earth to pray for us from time to time. Why not ask our faithful departed friends to pray for us?

Douglas Wilson suggests (in What Mary Knew - A Sermon on Luke 1:28 Christ Church – Moscow, ID Sermon #1754 – A.D. Dec. 15, 2013) one reason. To do so requires you to attribute a functional omniscience to the faithful departed. For example, you would ask your friend in China to pray for you via email, not via telepathy. And you cannot email the dead. So asking the dead to pray for you is a mistake. And it is especially undesirable as it attributes the the departed saints something which is proper only to God.

Wilson also points out, by the way, that the youngster Mary was an well-educated adept Bible student and an accomplished Systematic Theologian with wonderful poetry at her fingertips. She could have been an excellent preacher. In fact, for 30 years, perhaps no one understood Jesus and his mission better.   

Christmas Parrot Joke

Three wealthy sons each gave their elderly mother a Christmas present. The first son gave her a new house. The second gave a new car. But, the third said to his brothers, “you know mum can’t see very well these days.  So I’ve spent £20,000 on a most  gifted parrot money can buy and I’ve had him trained to recite all her favourite poetry. He’s amazing.”

After Christmas the old lady wrote “thank you” letters. To the first son she wrote: “Thank you so much for the house. Sadly it is rather too large. I much prefer my small flat.” To the second she wrote: “Thank you so much for the car. Sadly my failing eyesight means I can no longer drive.” But to the third she wrote as follows: “Dear Donald, thank you that at least You have the good sense to know exactly what your mother likes. The chicken was delicious.”

http://www.afaithtoliveby.com/2013/12/19/carols-at-city-church-the-text-of-my-talk/

The blessings of clergy-life

Being a Vicar isn't what it was, but sometimes the clergy can be moaning minies. There are real challenges and pressures to ordained life, but real blessings and opportunities too.

(1) The best work in the world. It is your job to pray, read the Bible and tell people about Jesus. If that does not excite you at least some of the time you should urgently apply to stack shelves in Tescos.

(2) You are largley your own boss and can do what you like though it might not feel like it

(3) You will not make your millions or keep up with the Joneses but you are unlikley to starve untill retirement

(4) You live in an adequate 4 bedroomed house with study and loo that should be maintained for you by the Diocese and decorated by the PCC. It may not be a mansion but in some places it might be the best house in the parish and in others it is far far more than you could ever hope to afford in that postcode.

(5) There is no heavy lifting involved

(6) If you want to you can probably have breakfast, lunch and dinner with the wife and kids most days. Remember that someone who commutes to work in the city leaving at 6:50am and getting back at 7:10pm may only see his kids from the ages of 0-7 at the weekend.

C of E Ministry Selection Criteria

There are lots of good and useful things in there. But maybe we need a long hard look at the Pastoral Epistles again. For example, what of 1 Timothy 3:4-5 “He must manage his own household well, with all dignity keeping his children submissive, for if someone does not know how to manage his own household, how will he care for God’s church?” Maybe this is also another argument for delaying the start of formal training if, that is, we are going to delay marriage and having kids. Maybe the home is a key training ground for the church, which is after all the household and family of God. When it comes to references for ordination training it would be nice to be able to write, "Johnny has set a wonderful example of loving and serving his wife and children. They all clearly love Jesus and delight in serving Him together."

Clergyperson, what will you do next week?

One of the potential blessings and pitfalls of clergy life is that to a considerable degree you can organise your own time.

You need to decide how organised you are going to try to be.

You could just go with the flow but sometimes there might only be a trickle and mostly there'll be a flood. You might find the stress and pressure energising but its probably not the best to be always last minute.

It seems to me that you should at least plan to read Sunday's readings on Monday. That will help you know what's the minimum ammount of study you could get by with if the worst comes to the worst. And it will allow the passages to begin to ferment in your mind. Your best sermons are unlikely to be those that are dashed out entirely on Saturday night and Sunday morning. Your sermon prep is not done when you've got something to say for X number of minutes. Your preaching requires some of your best efforts each week.

You need to plan in your day off. It is helpful if your family and perhaps your congregation know when its going to be! You'll want to see something of your family and have a bit of a rest or at least a change if work has been exhausting.

Likewise you need to plan your holidays ahead. In fact, if you are going to do lots of summer weddings and you want a summer holiday, and you're doing a camp, and you're restricted to the school holidays, you probably need to plan about 3 years ahead!

Study is unlikely ever to get done unless it is planned. 

Then you can be intentional about your actual job of prayer, ministry of the word, evangelism, discipleship and ministry training.

But even if you are very given to planning and organisation, you will need to keep some flexibility. Sometimes there will be real pastoral crises that simply must be dealt with that week. A friend of mine had to do 3 funerals in the week before Christmas once. That's a challenge if the time you had expected to be able to use to prepare for the biggest gigs of the year suddenly disappears to nothing.

In planning your week, you would do well to know yourself. For example, can you study for 10 hours a day or are you done in after 8? And if you are, would a visit in the middle have helped or hindered your productivity? Is it energisisng to spend time with people (and with whom for what purposes!) or do you find that exhausting? Are there some things for which you need to preserve your best energy or after which you need to blow off steam or wind down? If your PCC finishes at 10am and you won't get to sleep for another 2 hours, do you want a meeting at 7am the next day? What can you do in the down time which does not require maximum concentration?

Things like funerals and weddings are high wire acts and require lots of focus and attention. You don't want to Commit the wrong person to the flames or marry the bride to an old flame. After a funeral you may want to go for a drive with the car roof down and the stero blairing, and then walk the dog. After a wedding you may need to sit down with a nice cuppa.

Clearly if you're going to plan in any major way you also need to plan some time to plan - though of course you've got to avoid infinite regress, here. If you're a Getting Things Done person you need regular time with your In Bucket, your next actions, waiting for lists and projects. Maybe twice a year you probably want a half day away with your Bible, your diary and a notebook for a bit more of a strategic review and dream!

Plan wisely with an eye to how you can best do your job. And plan to be flexible.

Oh, and maybe those who are into the warm and fuzzies would add something appropriate here about being not just doing. Amen.

Christmas cracker jokes

Where does Santa go to dance?
Snowballs

What's a snowman's favourite food?
Ice-burgers

What do you get if you cross a vampire and a snowman?
Frost-bite

What do you get if you cross an archer with a gift-wrapper?
Ribbon Hood

Why does Santa have 3 gardens?
So that he can Ho, Ho, Ho!

Which of Santa's reindeer needs to mind his manners most?
"Rude"olph!

What do elves learn in school?
The Elf-abet!

Why do Santa's little helpers get depressed?
Because they have low elf esteem

What is a mum's favorite Christmas carol?
Silent night!

If athletes get athlete's foot, what do astronauts get?
Missile toe

Why doesn't Santa allow his helpers to ride on his sleigh?
Elfin safety

How does Good King Wenceslas like his pizza?
Deep and crisp and even (or Deep pan crisp and even)

Why doesn't Santa link to get stuck in the chimney?
Because he suffers from Claus-trophobia

How does Jack Frost get to work?
By icicles

Why did the turkey cross the road twice?
To show he wasn't chicken

What's furry and minty?
A Polo bear

What do ghosts eat?
Spookgetti

What does an angry kangaroo do?
Get hopping mad

 What do you get if you cross a fish and two elephants?
Swimming trunks

Why did the golfer wear two pairs of trousers?
In case he got a hole in one

Person of The Year

Time magazine has named Pope Francis as it's Person of the Year for 2013.

Now, I am no expert on the Holy Roman Pontif. And I expect that if His Holiness and I got chatting about matters soteriological we might soon find that we disagreed pretty fundamentally.

Yet, even to this ill-informed Reformed English cleric, there is no doubt that Francis is inspirational.

For one thing, if I am doing so well at 77 I shall be very pleased. Francis undeniably shows great energy and charisma. He seems to have a love for life and for people that is infectious and which might just catch on even in the church.

He also seems to exhibit a generosity and outgoingness that mirror the life of God Himself. He seems willing to embrace those who don't always seem that lovely. Kissing the feet of convicts is a bit grim but a bit Christlike.

And it seems that this is not just show-boating for the cameras. The Pope seems to show a genuine humility and simplicity. He calls for a poor church for the poor, a church which is a battle-field hospital, and that is surely right. This is the church as servant and comforter, before she is doctrinal police-person. In his words, The Supper “is not a prize for the perfect but a powerful medicine and nourishment for the weak.” Francis has sought to exemplify these things and seems to do so in an exemplary way, no easy thing in today's media circus which is so alive to any whiff of hypocrasy.

Some people have seen Francis as a potential "liberalising reformer". Maybe. But I'm not sure he has actually called for any changes in doctrine or in the moral teaching of the church? However, he has sounded open, kind, compassionate and pastoral. No doubt there are dangers in this being misheard but there are opportunities too and the laying down of the law has opposite dangers.

The Pope asks us to pray for him and perhaps we might, with hope, as no doubt the Pope would agree, not so much in Francis but in his God.

Clergyperson, what will you do today?

I put it to you that with some thought and resolve, you probably have the time and energy to do what you really want to do.

There are some things you are legally obliged to do:

Say Morning and Evening Prayer in Parish Church each day. This might take about half an hour each - less time if you lived next door to the church and wanted to do the minimum, longer if you hvae a fair drive or walk to the church.

Celebrate Holy Communion and preach a sermon in the parish church every Sunday and Principal Holy Day. You will want to prepare your sermon well. This will probably take you about 8 hours a week, give or take.

You are required by your Bishop to attend Clergy Chapter meetings.

You must have at least 4 PCC meetings a year.

You must baptise (or cause to be baptised) those who live in the Parish after necessary preparation.

You will also need to burry (or cause to be burried) parishoners.

You may have a churchyard to administer (or cause the be administered).

There maybe roles that go with your job, such as being a Governor at the parish Church school.

There is a bit of admin that needs doing: for example, things need registering and returns need to be made the the Registrar and the Diocese. Your fees need sending off. Someone else could do some of this for you, but you will have to sign bits of paper.

Now, beyond that, you are free to choose what you do. I know you don't feel like you are, but you are, really. No one can make you do other stuff.

So that leaves you with some free time each week, right? What are you going to do? You could shoot and fish or put your feet up or botanize, but you probably won't. It could be right for you to study and write but it probably isn't.

Some stuff you will probably do for the sake of good will, or because it is expected, or because you always have, or because the previous Vicar did, or to keep Mr Jones happy or..... But that should always be a deliberate strategic decision.

You must remember what your job is: the cure of souls, prayer and the ministry of the word, making disciple-making disciples, evangelism, nurture, discipleship and ministry training. How are you going to do that today?

Many of the things you will be tempted to do may be good and useful, but are they the best way of doing your actual job?

Doing what you want and need to do can only be done it there is lots of stuff you don't do. And not doing stuff is hard. 

Welcome, Hypocrites!

It must be a slow news month. We've just had "Vicar dares to hint to the most discerning 11 year olds that Santa may not be entirely starightforwardly "real"" in the national press and now we have "Vicar Wants People To Go To Church - SHOCK!".

A clergyman has dared to suggest in his parish magazine that it would be good if the carols people love to sing in church at Christmas affected their whole lives for the rest of the year and indeed brought them to church on other occassions. I am amazed this is controversial.

True enough, perhaps it is not the best politics. Being charged with hypocrasy for turning up at a carol service without going to church the rest of the year may put you off turning up to the carol service rather than make you go every other week. It will be interesting to see if the parish magzine article with its free nationwide circulation draws them in or drives them away.

Let me just say that you are always very welcome to any of the churches I serve whether once a year or every week. We hope you'll come and come back. We'll so "hello" and try to be nice without being too pushy and you are welcome to stay for a coffee and a biscuit afterwards. There's no need to sign up for the flower rota in week one. If you'd like to investigate the Christian faith further, we provide specific opportunities for that, as well as plenty of chances to eat and drink and hang around with Christian believers and so on. 

It's true that the church welcomes hypocites. And that's good news because the fact is, in different ways we are all hypocrites to some degree. None of us lives up to our own best standards and the intentions of our better moments and I can tell you that applies to those of us who normally go to church 3 times on a Sunday perhaps more than to those who don't. In short, the church welcomes sinners, because Jesus did, but if we're to come to him we have to admit that's what we are. And if that seems a bit rude, I'm afraid you have to take that up with Our Lord. He said some pretty outrageous things (especially about so-called religion) and it got him into a little trouble with the powers that be, if not in the Judean Telegraph.

The Proc Trust Blog on Chanting The Psalms

When do we strat?

The pastoral extra of the poor parson

This is not a new thought, but it is, I think, an true, important and useful one. It is, perhaps, something I need reminding of. Maybe you do too, whether you are a pastor or a church member (or both!).

We live in an age when wonderful Christian resources are readily available. The works of Owen, Edwards and Calvin will cost you less than a good car. Indeed, if you are willing and able to read online, much classic material is free. You can read the sermons of Augstine, Chrysostom, Luther, Spurgeon or Simeon. Click and Keller, Piper or Driscoll will preach to you, your chosen sermon on your chosen text in the comfort of your own home. The ministerial supermarket has arrived and delivery is free, no strings attached.  

So what place the poor parson?

He does not have the gifts of any of these greats and he does not have the hype of the ecclesiastical super-stars. He may be lacking in degrees or titles. He may not put on the best show within striking distance. You did not choose him and you can't get rid of him. You may not like him. What is the point of him?

One thing about him is that he is there and he can be there for his people. If your son is dying you can probably ring him at 3am and he will probably come. If you ask to see him about your soul, likely he will talk to you that week. When you can no longer get out, he will arrange for bread and wine and Bible and prayer to come to you if you ask him. He may well pray for you every day, perhaps twice, and perhaps once a month he prays for you by name. He can know and be known by you. If he will only stay put, he may well have baptised you and married you by the time he comes to burry your parents. You and he will have walked the same streets, drank in the same pub, used the same shop. You will have observed his way of life and seen his family. He ought to love you and perhaps for all his faults and foibles you might come to love him a little too. Maybe there is a place for the poor parson after all.  

The police & God

I have just heard someone on Radio 4's Today Programme complaining that the police base their suspicions of people on outward appearances. To my mind this is neither surprising nor blameworthy. After all, human beings can only look on outward appearances. God alone can look upon the heart.

Now, what the police might regard as "suspicious" is another matter.

Jospeh & Jospeh

The Rev'd Douglas Wilson points out some interesting parallels between Jospeh of multi-coloured coat fame and Joseph the father of Our Lord:

Both had fathers called Jacob
Both Josephs were righteous men
Both were involved in a sexual scandal in which they were innocent
Both Jospehs had prophetic dreams
Both combined integrity and compassion
Both Jospehs went down into Egypt and thereby saved their families
Both were kingly. Jospeh becomes a prince in Egypt; Jospeh is a son of David

The name Joseph means "increase". Christ is "increase", blessing for the world.

"Jourines" in the Christmas Story

The angels (from the realms of glory) to Mary, Joseph, shepherds etc.

Mary to Elizabeth

Mary and Joseph from Nazareth to Bethlehem

The Magi from the East to Jerusalem and Bethlehem and back by another route

The shepherds to the stable

(Herod's soldiers doing their wicked work)

The flight of the Holy Family into Egypt

The Lord Jesus Christ from the throne of glory to our sinful world, to the womb of Mary and then to a manger

Further jottings:

Mary and Jospeh from Nazareth in Galillee to Bethlehem in Judea for census

110 miles and take you about 2 hrs 20 mins to drive today

With a bit of walking you could get 3 different busses and do it in just over 4 hrs.

You might walk the 98 miles in 33 hours – a few days

Pregnant! Etc.

Shepherds from hillside to stable - ? a mile or 2?

They could probably go there comfortably that night

Magi / Wise men / kings from the East

If you go straight across the desert, it’s 540 miles from Babylon to Jerusalem.

Probably take them at least a month

Mary, Joseph and Jesus from Bethlehem to Egypt

At least 200 miles

Which was the longest journey of all?

The longest journey ever:

The circumferance of the globe is 24,902 miles. How long would that take you?

As far back as 1980 it was possible to journey around the world on scheduled flights in about 44 hours. 

The world record for the longest journey is held by 61-year-old Rosie Swale Pope, who travelled 20,000 miles across 12 countries.

Jesus from the throne of heaven to a manger for us

Eventually to the cross

Similarly, http://marclloyd.blogspot.co.uk/2013/12/nazareth-to-bethlehem-not-longest.html